Do not get on this bus

It's Sexual Assault Awareness Month, I think I saw. I was trying to think of something to write about that, but this caught my eye before I managed it, so it's going to do, for now. 

Ugh, writing. The self critical voice is a useful one, no doubt, but not always when you're in the middle of trying to write something you know isn't the best, but the voice in your head that second guesses every word choice makes you so paranoid you can't actually make it any better. Gah! The Cheese Factor, it's a literary tar pit.

When the shark bites, when the bee stings...

M from www.drinkyourcunt.tumblr.com

Favourite guilty pleasure, srsly. Though I don't even feel guilty. He's so endearing and entertaining.


I mean, come on:

Anonymous asked: So.....
Even though I know it's most likely impossible for you to be my calculus teacher, I can no longer look at him the same way again......You guys are sooooo similar, it's uncanny.....But hey, now I go to class everyday. I pay close attention to his lips when he talk (mostly because I want them alll over me now) and watch his fingers when he points......So....being slightly obsessed with you is helping me pass calculus......

I am totally your calculus teacher and you should totally confront me about being sexy on the Internet.

That makes me happy, reading that. 

And this makes me happy too, the little adorable sweetie pants.

And then there was the post by his friend, who said that his readers only know the naughty bits, they don't know how he gives her hugs and kisses her on the forehead each time they meet.

All the expert cunnilingus sounds great, like, but I have to say at this point in my life, the thing I keep coming back to is the idea of getting kissed on the forehead.


You're safe, M, about 5 people read this blog, so no more fame explosion will befall you. But thank you for the cheer you bring to my day. 

Black and white ink fun

hot fuck sunday

Oh, it's not Sunday? Ah well. I have to try and write some Romance. Without any theme or prompt. I hate that. Someone tell me what to write about?

Kristina's writing romance with a gangbang. Sigh. I tend to fall into this pit of sappiness I don't necessarily want to explore when I try and write romance. Then I struggle out of the Happy Ever After ending dripping with the syrup of it and desperately trying to wipe myself clean.

But worse than that is that when I'm confronted with the idea of having to write a story without a theme or title, I am met with a terrible blankness. 'What I did on my Summer Holidays', anyone? I'd better go stick a fork in the ass of my imagination. Er, not in its ass. I don't think that's quite what romance is about. This could be why I'm more comfortable with erotica :) 

baha

I was having a little self indulgent weepy moment.

And then  I saw this, and it made me cackle out loud.

Heh.

Vajazzled

The concept of vajazzling makes me chortle. Ad does the phrase 'vajazzle your vajayjay'. Every time.  People get so scornful about it too. It's funny. I saw the above photo posted ironically the other day, in a post by a mommy blogger planning a new craftroom in the room of the eldest daughter who had flown the nest. One commenter was sarcastic about how authentic her smile looked.

And then a little later I had a sudden flashback! To the pornographic novel I found in my parents' bookshelf, which I recognised as fairly classic, and had an early prototype vajazzling scene within that I had completely forgotten about. I had to Wikki it to find the title because it was gone, gone, I couldn't quite reach it. One of those ones about turning a bored housewife into an ever-ready-for-it whore, you know the way. Of course it was Emanuelle and it had a scene where she goes to a party to get gangbanged, but first they take her away and dress her in filmy diaphanous white and painstakingly attach tiny pearl beads to each and every one of her pubic hairs! Ha! I thought, as I remembered that detail. Vajazzling is not new! Then I wondered how they do it now that nobody has pubes anymore. With a hot glue gun, it must be.

Of course it is! And this photo explains the smile - she was doing an educational photo shoot!

Lord, I'd forgotten about Emanuelle. That was educational.

I will leave you with a little soupcon of the entertainment the internet has to offer.

teehee!